here we go..

5 more days..

excited yet nervous..

the ol' man could read the fear in my eyes..

really appreciated his pep talk and advice..

he went to the extent to show me his weddin' vid..

cool or what..

the key is..

be happy..

and laugh it off..

final bachelor weekend..

nothin' much..

nothin' special..

just good times with the normal guys..

and one whom i least expected to spend with..

that's all..

whatever it is..

just be happy..

and here we go..

our place..

at press time..

at esplanade now..

all alone..

enjoyin' the fresh night breeze..

thinkin'..

i'm someone who dwells on sweet past memories..

and i do have those in abundance..

here at the esplanade and marina area..

especially with you..

when either of us were in trouble..

we'll always be here for each other..

and i miss that..

and i will miss it again..

soon..

nine more days..

johnny..

the pressures pilin' up now..

less than two weeks away..

everything's gonna change..

there's no need for you to remind me..

boring..

i'm just very lethargic now..

tryin' to contain all these emotions..

feelings.. stress and worries..

it just need a slight spark..

and it will all come burstin' out..

and who would have thought..

it will happen at home..

that was ugly..

cry baby..

bro got himself a bike..

so happy for him..

his determination paid off..

this is what he had always wanted..

but i can't deny the fact that..

i'm gonna miss fetchin'..

and sendin' him back home..

miserably..

he's all grown up..

guess it's time to let the cub find his own food..

his own life now..

damn that really sucks..

beneath the surface..

went to underwater world over the weekend..
guess it's kinda my last holiday before april..

over the week..
met with bros from school..
most are married..
and told tales of how married life is like..

compromise.. tolerance.. understanding..
crucial pillars in marriage..
that i know..
and i know it's gonna be difficult..

one even thought of divorce..
it's as if there's no way for reason..
very melancholic indeed..

my fair share of problems will come too..

in any marriage..
it may appear calm and tranquil..
but beneath the sea..
beneath that calm exterior..
lies troubled waters..
occassionally..

lust anniversary..

lust week..

10 years on..

wow..

nuff said..

: (

my apology..

i'm very sorry.. : (

the ugly brother..

i don't know what got into me..
i was like a ragin' bull..
and baby afirah was my victim..

really hated myself..
went totally berserk..
i was a lunatic..

and what's the root?
it was 10.15pm..
and she wasn't done with her homework..

it was past her bedtime..
and i was haranguin' her like mad..
she could have jizzed in her pants..

after the whole debacle..
i couldn't believe it just happened..
like after so long..

i guess it was anger.. frustration..
stress and all..
being fenced up too long inside..

i thanked god i didn't even touch her..
i never want to be that ugly again..
especially to her..

i'm sorry afirah..
i still love you ok..

nothin' can spoil this day for you bro..

i have never been proud of you in my entire life younger bro..
i'm so happy that you have achieved your goal..
no words can express how i feel right now..
i'm glad that you shared your happiness and success with me..

though i'm a bit worried..
with regards to your personal safety..
and the realities of ridin'..
but the ecstasy of you passin' still beats everythin'..

but i know you won't disappoint me bro..
promise me you'll take care of yourself..

today is your day..
don't let anythin' else spoil it..

you deserved it..
you earned it..
well done younger brother..
i'm very proud and happy for you..