screamin' silently..

lately.. i'm confused.. so confused that i can't even explain what's wrong with me.. but the most shitty part of it all.. i can't tell anyone.. coz i'm too embarrassed.. too embarrassed to the extent.. i can't even tell my own fiance the problem.. (yes.. in case you don't know.. i got engaged last Aug.. hope to be happily married next year.. god's will)..

by right.. to me it's not actually a problem.. it's just a phase.. and this phase actually pleases me very much.. this phase has been brewin' since last dec.. i actually really like it.. and this phase will pass me by sooner or later.. ironically i don't want it to go away at all.. but from a practical point of view it has to.. and with the closin' down of jp store soon.. it is bound to go away.. but i really don't want that to happen.. oh my.. the torment!.. since i can't express this feelings with anyone.. all i have been doin' for the past two months or so.. was just scream silently at my poor miserable self.. so the drama..

and damn it!.. tonight is the start of the jp store closin' down reno project.. great timing..